Is Therapy for Me?

Is Therapy for Me? Short answer…YES!

Where should I begin? You may ask yourself is therapy for me or contemplate if you really need therapy. Well I’m here to tell you that it is my personal belief that EVERYONE could benefit from therapy. For the longest, I tried to talk myself out of the notion of therapy until life slapped me in the face when my father unexpectedly passed away and I still avoided therapy with everything in me even when I knew deep down I needed it and would benefit from it. I was just getting by letting things and people in my life that I knew didn’t deserve to be there and placing my happiness in those things. I chose to ignore certain aspects of my life because in that moment I felt happy for once since my daddy passed. I was placing the responsibility of my happiness on something/someone else instead of continuing to make myself happy. The biggest problem with that is when that person or thing fails you (which they inevitably will) then your source of happiness is depleted. When you are the source of your happiness you don’t have to worry about letting yourself down and you have an unlimited supply of happiness.

 I thank God for the people he placed in my life at that time who may or may not know that they inspired me to go to therapy. My friends, Shanice, Lexi and Kayla all would speak to me about their therapy journey without knowing that I was struggling myself to commit to going to speak with someone. They all told me about their individual journeys and how therapy was helping. At the time, Shanice was in graduate school getting her Masters in Mental Health Counseling, so she was a big advocate for therapy as she has seen the positive affects both personally and professionally. My good friend and Sorority Sister, Marissa is also a mental health professional and I went to Atlanta for a wedding and stayed with her and I believe it was nothing but God that I stayed with her that weekend. We both needed each other more than we knew. She confided in me about her own personal issues and I confided in her as well and then she proceeded to tell me to check to see if my company had an Employee Assistance Program (EAP). She explained to me that an EAP has a host of benefits for employees but most importantly to me I found that I could have 8 FREE sessions of therapy for every issue that I encountered. I already thought that my job was amazing, but this just put the icing on the cake. So of course, I have no excuse not to go the therapy now, right? WRONG…I still put it off. I was terrified. I don’t let much scare me and usually face my problems head on, but I was just tired of crying, tired of thinking of the what ifs, tired of rehashing all the unresolved scenarios in my life. So, I researched the EAP and even made appointments that I conveniently missed or came up with excuses not to go to and then I found myself back in Atlanta just for a visit and spent some time with my friend Shannon. We went out for drinks one night and had the best conversation and I’m pretty sure he’s totally unaware of the effect that conversation had on me but he explained to me how therapy had such a positive influence on his life and he also introduced the idea of telehealth to me and that’s when I was like “OK Jasmine you have no excuse you can talk to someone on the phone or facetime and don’t even have to leave your hotel room or occupy your Saturday”.

 I immediately scheduled my first telehealth session. In that first hour of therapy, I tried to tell that lady my whole life story. My mouth just started running. Things were coming out that I didn’t even realize I remembered. I cried, I purged, and I felt a weight lift off my shoulders after I hung up that phone. What exactly was I dreading? What was I scared of? Therapy helped way more than it hurt. I am currently on session number 6. I was going every week, but she politely let me know that I don’t really need to speak to her every week once we worked through the big issues. So now I call her when I need to which I haven’t had to in a couple of months. She suggested books and gave me small tasks to work on after each session. One of which being journaling which is something I have always done but seemed to be doing more so with a purpose. Definitely something I would recommend. I’ve worked on my discipline, strengthening my relationship with God, and have decided to remain celibate during this journey going on month 7 now. (Whew Chile lol). Honestly, my life is amazing now with all the subtle changes I have made by eliminating unnecessary distractions and focusing on Jasmine. So, no matter how big or small the issue is or even if you think you don’t have an issue, therapy can heal some wounds that you didn’t know needed to be healed and can also trigger a domino effect of healing in your life, so it doesn’t hurt to give it a try!

With Love,

Jasmine Kaye